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Below are the 9 most recent journal entries recorded in I'll have potato waffles with that thank you very's LiveJournal:

    Thursday, January 22nd, 2004
    11:53 pm
    Oh c#nt
     I appear to be unable to use lj tags correctly. Still. Winner's a c#nt.
    11:44 pm
    THE RULES!
    1 - Leave a comment, saying you want to be interviewed.
    2 - I will respond; I'll ask you five questions.
    3 - You'll update your journal with my five questions, and your five answers.
    4 - You'll include this explanation.
    5 - You'll ask other people five questions when they want to be interviewed

    ( Questions from <lj user= )
    Monday, July 7th, 2003
    7:17 pm
    Friday, July 4th, 2003
    2:44 pm
    2:33 pm
    The one restaurant critic Ramsay deeply admires is Michael Winner whom he finds 'a fascinating guy'. Dearly though I love Michael Winner, I have to say this is rather an, ahem, unusual choice. But according to Ramsay: 'Over the last seven years I've learnt how to look after him. What I've learnt is, the minute you remove a plate, make sure the next one's ready, so it gives him very little chance to put his head up and slag off the glasswork or the pictures. He's a very tough cookie. He came in a few months ago and said to Jean-Claude [maitre d], "I'd like that table there". And Jean-Claude said, "Oolala, Monsieur Winner, that table is for six and there's only two of you". He said, "Jean-Claude. I Want. That. (edit)Lovely. Table". So Jean-Claude came to me in the middle of service and said "Oolala, Monsieur Winner is being difficult". I said: "What's (edit)bloomin' well new? He says he wants the table in the centre, for six, and it's booked." But Michael Winner said: "Well put them in the bloody bar, serve them Dom Perignon and tell them they're here as my guests - I want that table. So he did it." And were the customers happy? 'Over the moon. Six free dinners. And then of course I tried not to present him with the bill but Michael said, "Gordon if I ask for the bill for those six people, I want the (edit)lovely bill". He is the most generous 60-year-old in Britain.'

    (edit)C*nt.

    Current Music: Feel Good Time - Pink
    2:16 pm
    People may remember that I was thrown out of a certain rugger bugger's restaurant when I went there with the lovely Joany Collins...what most papers don't report is that I was thrown out for making the following rib-tickling retort to the waiter who offered to take my coat.

    'Why do you want my coat, you jumped up twot? Don't you have one of your own?'

    Joany laughed so much that she soaked her Tena Lady. Then Ramsay punched her. I said that my name was Michael Winner as I ran off giggling.
    2:14 pm
    AA Gill - better dressed than Bryan Ferry
     GQ Top 10 best dressed

    1. David Beckham, 2. Jude Law, 3. David Bowie, 4. Pierce Brosnan, 5. Tom Ford, 6. Robbie Williams, 7. David Furnish, 8. AA Gill, 9. Bryan Ferry, 10. Ioan Gruffudd.

    Suck on that, Winner.
    1:02 pm
    I am the god of hellfire
     Winner will burn.
    We're gonna slice him and lightly grill him like slices of fat purple aubergine.
    And he fanices Simon Cowell.
    Gaylord.
    10:22 am
    My celebrated article 'Heterogay' from 1998
     Mum, dad, I'm gay and I'm proud. Proud and free, free to clap my hands at window displays. Free to laugh with a little shriek. Free to ask strangers where their delicious scent came from. But there's a problem - sorry, another problem. I don't want to have sex with men. I really, really don't want to have sex with men. I've tried to force myself to think about it till I'm limp. The truth is, I only really like doing it with girls. Always have, always will. The one hard and fast rule of my sex life is only one willy in the bed at a time.

    Apart from when I bang Michael like the girl he is. Squeal baby, squeal.
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